As a parent, there is probably nothing more difficult than not hearing your child’s voice. If your child isn’t talking yet, you’re not alone – and there’s so much you can do to help. Getting your child to communicate will be an intensive task, but one that will reap great rewards – not only for you but in your child’s ability to navigate their own world.
Before You Begin: Creating the Foundation
Before you can teach your child new communication skills, you need a willing learner. Here are two crucial questions to ask yourself:
- Does my child approach me or appear to care about my presence?
- Does my child reference me at all?
If you respond ‘no’ to both of these questions, you need to begin with pairing and joint attention first.
Step 1: Pairing with Reinforcement
The first step in creating a willing learner is pairing yourself and your environment with reinforcement. Essentially, we want you to become a motivator to your child. We want everything to be more fun when you are around (it’s fun to jump on the trampoline, but it is even more fun when mom is around).
How to Begin Pairing:
- Identify as many motivators as possible – Use preferred items and activities that your child enjoys
- Control access to preferred items – Put items out of reach or in containers that only you have access to
- Always be a giver, not a taker – You want to be associated with giving things, not taking things away
- Give reinforcement for ‘free’ – The child doesn’t need to earn or request items during pairing
- Deliver reinforcement several times a minute
- Get involved in the fun – Insert yourself to make toys and activities even more enjoyable
- Talk naturally – If your child tolerates you talking, continue to say the names of items, but don’t require them to talk back
Signs That Pairing is Working:
- Is your child approaching you more frequently?
- Is your child reaching for you or your hand?
- Is your child physically reaching to take valued items from you when offered?
- Are your child’s vocalizations increasing in your presence (babbling or words)?
Step 2: Developing Joint Attention
Joint Attention can be broadly defined as “reciprocal interaction” and “shared experience.” It’s comprised of both initiations (showing items/activities, eye contact, commenting and gestures) and responses (gaze shifts, joint object/activity attention).
Why Joint Attention Matters:
- Research has identified a relationship between joint attention skills and language development
- Joint attention is predictive of language skills in both typically developing children and children with autism
- Language may be learned during episodes of “joint attention”
- Joint attention has correlation with measures of social competence
Joint attention develops when adults are paired with reinforcement, attending and engagement. You begin by providing reinforcement for ANY initiating and responding behaviors and gradually shape better quality responses.
Step 3: Teaching Requesting – The Most Important Communication Skill
The most important form of ‘talking’ for an early learner is requesting. This is when the child can ask for things they need from their immediate environment. It’s also the strongest form of communication you can teach since the outcome is so immediate and satisfying to the child.
Should You Use Pictures, Signs, or Speech?
Picture Exchange (PECS): May be appropriate if your learner has limited vocal imitation and physical/neurological disabilities that might make signing challenging.
Sign Language: May be appropriate if your learner gestures and has strong fine motor skills.
Vocal Requesting: Appropriate if your child can imitate your sounds or words frequently.
Important: Research has shown that the use of sign language or picture exchange can actually encourage talking – they don’t prevent speech development.
Teaching Vocal Requesting
Step 1: Use Vocal Imitation
- When the child looks like they want something, model the word (e.g., “bubbles”)
- As soon as they echo the word or part of the word, immediately deliver the item
- Use the procedure of ‘shaping’ – try to get closer to the real word each time
- If they don’t echo after three presentations, deliver the item anyway
Step 2: Fade to Independent Requesting
- Once your child is imitating consistently, try to fade out the model
- Hold out the item but don’t say the word – wait to see if they ask independently
- If they ask independently, give them MORE THAN ONE item (this shows asking on their own gets them more)
- If they don’t ask within a few seconds, give a partial verbal prompt (just the beginning sound)
What Words to Teach First
Focus on items that your child loves the most. These may include:
- Food items (cookie, chip, water)
- Movies, music, books
- Toys (bubbles, ball, car)
- Physical reinforcers (tickles, spin, jump)
Important: Do NOT teach “more,” “please,” “yes,” or “no” initially. Teach the names of specific items or actions. If you teach “more,” you’ll have a child saying “more” without the ability to tell you what they actually want more of.
Advanced Communication Strategies
Language Expansion Techniques
1. Have Fun! – Talk in an engaged and slightly animated voice. Children are motivated to communicate with someone that demonstrates warmth and affection.
2. Minimize Direct Questions – When children look at you, avoid immediately presenting demands like “what do you want?” Instead, take this as an opportunity to engage them by making a comment or giving a reinforcer.
3. Make Interactions Purposeful – Treat what the learner is doing as purposeful and guide that behavior into something more meaningful.
4. Commenting and Expanding – Watch what the child is doing and comment on it. For example: Child identifies a picture: “You found the horse! Horses live on a farm.”
5. Use Abundant Gestures and Facial Expressions – Exaggerate gestures and expressions to make them easier for children to pick up on.
6. Modeling – Present an example of what the child should say. The child is NOT required to echo back the model.
7. Give Choices – Present language with parts children wouldn’t otherwise use: “Do you want to save the cookie or eat it now?”
Creating Communication Opportunities Throughout the Day
Set Up Communicative Situations
- Hold all needed items for a play activity until the child requests them
- “Sabotage” the environment slightly to encourage communication
- Example: Hold all the animals for a play-set, so when the child reaches, you can say “Oh, you want the brown horse? Here you go…here comes the cow too…cows say ‘moo'”
Count Your Success
- Set a goal of hundreds of requests per day across many reinforcers, teachers and settings
- Count prompted requests (when your child echoes you) and independent requests
- Aim for somewhere between 250-500 requests per day for early learners
- Each time the child gets the item they requested counts as ONE request
Tips for Success
- Be a “giver” not a “taker” – Rather than taking away items to get more requests, give items in small portions
- Sanitize the environment – Put away other reinforcing items so only target items are available
- Restrict “free access” – Don’t allow unlimited access to preferred items when you’re not actively teaching
Remember: Every Child Can Communicate
Whether your child develops vocal speech, uses signs, or communicates through pictures, every child has the capacity to communicate their wants and needs. The key is finding the right approach for your individual child and providing consistent, positive opportunities for communication throughout every day.
Your child’s journey to communication may look different from others, but with patience, consistency, and the right strategies, you will hear your child’s voice – in whatever form that takes.